For many, the significance of the Holiday Season is a combination of religious significance, gift-giving and reconnecting with friends and family.  But after an affair, what once seemed easy is now more complicated.  What is the right kind of gift to buy and what message do I want to give are now questions that need to be considered?  While we once looked forward to spending time together this year we worry about how to manage the awkwardness that may exist.

And what about the kids, don’t they deserve to have a good Holiday Season?  This is the time of year when some anticipate the arrival of Santa Claus, they look forward to spending time with parents, extended family and friends and they wonder whether the gift they so desire will be waiting for them.

How you spend time is not an all or nothing proposition and it is often best to give each other permission to have some alone time apart from one another.  Of course this requires trust that the partner who cheated is not going to use that their alone time to visit with their affair partner.  If this is still a concern then spending time together may not be a good idea and you should reconsider whether spending any time together during the holiday season is a good idea.

The Anatomy of An Affair series with David Feder continues with Being Alone for The Holidays in Episode #7.

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