While there is no known strategy that will guarantee that infidelity will not re-occur there are steps you can take to minimize the probability of it re-occurring. Some of these are provided below:
- Be sure to to maintain an open door policy with your partner that leaves you transparent. Secrets spell trouble for you and for your relationship. As Shirley Glass said, “keep the windows open at home. Put up privacy walls with others who can threaten your marriage.”
- Avoid making plans to lunch or take coffee breaks alone with people who you find yourself attracted to. If you have to travel for business do not meet with a member of the opposite sex in their room.
- If you are a person who is attracted to those who are in despair or in need of rescue, resist anyone who opens up to you and shares their despair with you. This is particularly true when the person you are attracted to is of the opposite sex.
- When a marriage is in trouble one of the first things that happen is that we find someone outside of our relationship to discuss problems that we are having at home. If you are having difficulty speaking with your partner, speak to a friend, or to a person who you consider to be caring of both your partner and yourself.
- If you are contacted by a former lover who expresses a desire to “get together”, either invite your partner to join you or at the very least, tell your partner that you have been contacted and by whom. If your partner expresses discomfort with you seeing your former partner, then re-consider the invitation particularly if you value your marriage, or relationship. The short-term high may result in an all-time low.
- Any “on-line friendships” that you have should be shared openly with your partner. This includes an open door policy involving all correspondence that you may have with your “friends” in chat rooms, emails, Facebook, Twitter and so on. You may even ask your partner to co-author correspondence. The exchanging of sexual fantasies on-line is generally taboo.
- Your circle of friends should be made up of people who value family and committed relationships. Preferably your friends would be in relationships that are solid and happy. Your friends should be those who do not value infidelity.